I'd like to introduce you to my shit licking, ass sniffing "friend" The Shaggy Dog. From the outset of my encampment in MySpace, I've occasionally noticed these sorry-ass bulletins promising you shitloads of new "friends". They usually start with something like "OMG I GOT TONS OF ADDS...." Okay, first of all, what the fuck is "omg"? This is one of the gayest acronyms I've ever seen and pisses me off to no end. I guess if you're a ten year old girl, then I can let it go. Anyone other that, who has ever typed "omg", is a pansy ass cocksucker and can burn in fucking hell. Anyway, from what I gather, you add the butt sucking losers in the bulletin, add yourself to the collection of retard whore sacks, and then you somehow get lots of random jerkoffs, who will probably never even look at your profile but desperately want to fatten up their "friends" list, to add you. Fucking brilliant, no? Amass as many parasitic cock worm nobodies who don't give two shits about who you are or the things you represent, just so you can look cool via the line "so-and-so has 665,474,987,354,165,768 friends" to the other pathetic feces munching crap bags on MySpace. Yeah that's just great. Your life must be very fulfilling. But back to the point, my furry fuck bucket "friend" posts about ten of these bulletins a day. I guess it kind of works; he went from 600-some "friends" to 1064 "friends" in the week or so that I've "known" him. Of course, he still only has 100 comments (not bad in general, but still kind of surprising for having over a thousand friends) and he put out a bulletin the other day stating that he had no picture comments. Like I said, hopping on the "OMG I AM A FUCKING FRIENDLESS DISEASE RIDDEN HOOKER WHO WILL SUCK YOUR DICK FOR YOUR FRIENDSHIP" bulletin train doesn't mean that you are going to find anyone that really gives a rat's ass about you. Hmmm, you know I don't really like dumbass friend-whore mammals, "friend" or not, sniffing my ass (that chick can totally sniff my ass anytime however)...